Pink Jobs, Blue Jobs

‘My old enemy, we meet again.’

It’s safe to say society has changed since the middle ages. We have running water, garbage trucks, and the ability to check Facebook from the comfort of our own beds. The days of brushing our teeth with charcoal and having to marry the first person we accidentally knock-up, or get knocked-up by, are way behind us.

Real Men Don’t Read Harry Potter

Harry, your wand has obviously grown with age.

I went to see the latest Harry Potter the other week. I’ve seen them all. Right from when Daniel Radcliffe looked like a little half man, half boy, leprechaun, with a voice to match, right up until now where he looks … actually, the same I guess.

Before I anger the diehard fans out there and end up being accosted in the street with ‘arseaholeous’ spells being thrown in my direction, I must say, I really like the movies. Before watching the most recent film I went out and actually watched all of them over again. And by the end of it I actually thought for a moment I could perhaps be a wizard, until my girlfriend got over me pointing a chopstick at her and saying the word ‘clothesoffious’ with different inflections and force. Sadly I had to concede the whole notion was fantasy.

21st Century Man: Thugs Or Wimps – Choose One.

Thugs up in your grill?

More and more often I find myself horrified at the brutality of my city. I’m sure violence and robberies and assaults are rampant in any big city the world over, but I’m amazed at how many of these situations occur in broad daylight or in the middle of a crowded street.

It seems the majority of men out there today are either thugs doing the intimidation, or are wimps turning a blind eye.

I know this sounds pretty bloody harsh, but lately I haven’t witnessed much to sway my opinion.

When All the Planets of the Solar System Align, Then we’ll Have Sex.

"You're right, this IS more interactive than a Wii console!"

We love sex. I love sex, you love sex, my 65 year old neighbours love sex. Actually, they really, really love sex – loud sex. Before you even finish your eye-opener coffee in the morning, you’ve probably been spanked with the notion of sex in a dozen different ways from a dozen different angles. Be it through the telly, newspaper, online news, patting the sauce bottle, squeezing your toothpaste, it’s bloody-well everywhere.

Maybe that’s why everyone freaks out when they think they ain’t gettin’ enough.