Spit and Spirits

Posts Tagged ‘adult

Men, Get the F##k Off the Couch and Do Some Housework

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The majority of guys are lazy, sooky, mummy’s boys. Don’t believe me? Have a conversation with any woman in a relationship with a dude and you can bet pretty much most of them will say their man does absolutely nothing around the house. And they mean nothing. As in doesn’t lift a God-damn finger, nothing.

How does this happen? How do two people get to the point where it seems totally normal for one to do every piece of housework while the other doesn’t do any? To me, it sounds like utter insanity. Read the rest of this entry »

I Think I Hear My Youth Screaming Goodbye

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‘Hey, I’ve got your enthusiasm right here.’

We’re all getting older.

You’re now older than you were since you just read that line. Now you’re even older again. It’s unavoidable. Like a hangover, or farting in bed.

I mean, we all know we’re on a constantly ticking journey towards a tearful eulogy and eager relatives at our will reading, but there are some parts of growing older that seem to sneak up on you. You turn around and suddenly bam! Father time has kicked you in the balls and stolen a few things that you once held closely and dearly to your younger, more enthusiastic self. Read the rest of this entry »

Stay Classy Gentlemen: 5 Tips To Dress Like An Adult – Tip 2

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Powderfinger would be bums without their jackets.

So I watched the Arias last night. Anyone who doesn’t know, the Arias are the Australian music awards. They’re like MTV awards, but with tall poppy syndrome rife in Australia everyone tries to come across totally laid back and chilled to the point one begins to wonder if the majority of Australian artists are half retarded.

Since I started this whole ‘stay classy gentlemen’ trip, I’ve been taking a lot more notice of what other dudes wear, and watching the Arias gave me a good chance to have a look at what the rock stars of Australia are into.

I’m sure if we had the confidence to strut around in rock star like clothes we all would. I know I would. Becoming a rock star would have to go down as my one of three wishes if I ever do find that genie.

However when it came time for Angus and Julia Stone to accept their award for album of the year, I sort of went WTF?? Read the rest of this entry »

Written by Jake Fox

November 8, 2010 at 11:04 pm

Stay Classy Gentlemen: 5 Tips To Dress Like An Adult – Tip 1

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Yeah, I wanna look like Sinatra.

I constantly get mistaken for someone about ten years younger than my actual age. I know to some this sounds like a stupid thing to worry about, but I tell you – it shits me big time.

It only just happened again yesterday. I met someone for the first time and we got chatting. I started talking of life and love etc, until he stopped me mid sentence and asked how old I was. When I told him he put on the usual amazed face and said he thought I was just out of uni and just some young dude in my early twenties. Then he made a joke about if I’d started shaving yet and if I still get asked for ID at the bottle’o.

It shits me. Read the rest of this entry »

Written by Jake Fox

November 7, 2010 at 1:09 am

Peter Pan Syndrome: Will Staying Young Really Win Wendy’s Heart?

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Oh Peter, you look sorta - old.

Peter stands on the shore of Never Land, golden sword trailing through shallow water. His small, pointy leather boots slowly fill with sand and discarded cigarette butts from nearby Pirate Town. A little way off shore Wendy kneels at the stern of a small launch being paddled by men with hunched shoulders and ragged hair. The men heave their oars through the water and draw closer to an impressive ship, resplendent with polished rails and colourful flags as if heralding the arrival of the young lady. Also decked out in finery is the man waiting to greet Wendy, who watches her approach through a lengthy spyglass. His richly darkened wig falls over a coat decorated with golden amulets and pearls taken from the most experienced of seafarers and the proudest of island warriors.

On the beach, Peter wipes mucus from his nose and trails it down the front of his green tunic with the back of his hand. “I thought we were in love!” he shouts at Wendy’s retreating figure.

Wendy turns and shrugs. “That may be so, but what do you expect Peter? Hook has a boat, and power, and treasure. He’s taking me to Bora Bora!” Read the rest of this entry »

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